


white light

by FancifulRivers



Series: white like an oleander [4]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Anxiety, Episode: s05e25 Legs From Here To Homeworld, Gen, Mind Control Aftermath & Recovery, Post-Episode: s05e25 Legs From Here to Homeworld, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-28
Updated: 2018-07-28
Packaged: 2019-06-17 14:24:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15463359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FancifulRivers/pseuds/FancifulRivers
Summary: White Pearl wants to find out who she is.





	white light

You hate Earth.

You hate this stupid planet, teeming with organic life that shouldn't exist anymore, and you hate that you're surrounded by traitors (you know things have come to an uneasy sort-of truce, but that doesn't matter when you stack it up against thousands of years of rebellion), and you hate that your Diamond just  _left you here_ with orders to watch after White Pearl (as if you'd do anything less). And you of  _course_ intend to fulfill those orders, but what are you supposed to do when those stupid  _Crystal Gems_ (crystal pebbles, more like) won't leave you  _alone_ to complete your duty?

You sulk, that's what you do. You comfort White Pearl as best as you can, in a tangle of pearls, and it hurts to listen to her sobbing because you know that deep, jagged place it comes from. Your Diamond has never treated you as badly as White Diamond treated her, but you've had your fair share of destabilizations, particularly in the beginning, and it burns your core to know that you weren't good enough.

"Is there any place we can take her?" You ask. You hate having to ask, but you don't think a lumpy couch is going to help her very much. Pearl looks thoughtful for a moment, then nods.

"The temple," she says. "My room-"

A full-body shiver goes through her when you all step through the temple doors. Worry splinters through you at the sight. Pearl's room is full of elegant towers of water. You might admire it another day, another time, but not now. Blue Pearl makes a soft sigh of appreciation next to you and you eye her irritably. You're not there to appreciate aesthetics, you're there to help fix a broken pearl.

"Why are you helping me?" White Pearl asks quietly, as if she can sense your thoughts. It is eerie to look at her now, to see undamaged skin where cracks used to be, to see her gem sparkling in her formerly crushed eye socket, not centered on her stomach.

"You deserve to be helped," Blue Pearl responds, just as softly. 

"I don't-" White Pearl cuts herself off, shaking her head. Tendrils of hair have escaped the tightly coiled buns on each side of her hair. You think it's probably a good sign.

"You do," you say, perhaps a touch too sharply, as she seems to recoil into herself for a moment. Blue Pearl just  _looks_ at you from under her bangs and you stifle a sigh. You're not good at this. You're built for brisk efficiency, just the way your Diamond wanted, and comforting platitudes are  _Blue's_ forte much more than they are yours.

But you are here and you're a pearl and you'll be shattered before you refuse to help a fellow pearl. You're glad none of the others followed you in here- not Pink (stars forbid, not Pink), not Garnet or Amethyst or anyone else.

"I don't know who I am anymore," White Pearl says in a weak, pleading voice, gripping her elbows tightly. "If I am not my Diamond's, then-"

"You can be whoever  _you_ want to be," Pearl says. You open your mouth to rebut her (how  _dare_ she say something so plainly not true), but then you see the look on White Pearl's face.

"I can?" White Pearl whispers.

"Look at me," Pearl says.  _Liar,_ you think. You are acutely aware of Pink Diamond's presence just beyond the temple doors. "Here on Earth, you can  _choose_. What do  _you_ want?"

"I want-" she falters, staring at the ground. "I want to try tea," she says, looking back up at you. You are unsurprised to see tear tracks down her face again. "And I want my hair down. And I want- I want to see Earth. Is that- is that all right?"

"Of course it is," Pearl says. You nod stiffly, and Blue Pearl murmurs assent.

"I like tea," Blue Pearl offers. "Especially with sugar."

"Tea with sugar, it is," Pearl says. "I'll make a fresh pot. Yellow, would you-" She hesitates. "Would you like to try something else?"

"I suppose," you say, reluctant. Pearl beams.

"There are so many drinks on Earth!" She begins in an enthusiastic tone. "There's coffee and apple cider and hot chocolate and juice of many different fruits and soda and-"

She keeps talking as you shepherd White Pearl back into the beach house. You share an amused look with Blue Pearl behind Pearl's back.

In some ways, Pearl hasn't changed a bit.


End file.
